Not Happy With My Older Works

Edit: I was tired when I wrote the last title, so I changed it to something more sensible. Man, I'm horrible with titles...

Everytime I look at my favorite projects, I'm proud of what I have planned and what I want to do with it. Then I read what I DID do, and I feel ashamed. The stories in question are Hero and Huntress, Tale of Heroes, Love of I, and Dawn of Darkness.

I loved writing those stories at the time when I was actively working on them, but now, I hang my head in shame.

Dawn of Darkness is probably my second oldest chapter-ed fiction that shows how bad I was, and it also shows how over the course of my updating, I progressively got better. At the same time, making it look like 8 different people wrote the story. I need to rethink where I wanna go with that one, then rewrite it.

Tale of Heroes is similar to Dawn of Darkness. A milestone of chapters showing my progressions as a writer (and I still have way more to learn.). It was the rewritten version of "Legend of Link" which was scrapped while I was writing the 6th chapter. The problem I'm having with Tale of Heroes, is I need to rewrite it a third time now to fix all my mistakes, both technical and personal.

Hero and Huntress, I'm not even gonna begin to tell you how bad I messed up on that one... It's like the dark-side, or in my case, the bad-side of fiction in general. Out-of-character properties, cliche dialogue, and redundant romance. (Not sure on the last one, I didn't reread it when I opened my eyes and understood the horror I created.)

Love of I wasn't so bad. The first chapter was written before it was a humor story, and I think I did pretty well on that, considering it captured a rather impressive number of readers for my standards. But most chapters from 2-6 make me ashamed to have written them in the first place. While I do like some of the things I did, like Samus using a hologram projector to look like Ivy and thus scaring the buhgezus out of Link to the point where he jumped out the window and plummeted into a bush below his window. Then there was the pink hat thing. Ahh, good times.

I wish I had a story that was my crowned jewel of stories. In fact, I'm hellbent on having atleast one of those stories that I can really, REALLY be proud of. A story with a good plot, interesting events, captivating structure, PROPER DIALOGUE AND CHARACTERISTICS (FOR GOD'S SAKE MAN), and was both enjoyable for me and the readers to experience.

If, no, when I make one of those, I will consider myself satisfied with what I've done. Until then, I will hunger to make something you all will enjoy. Including myself.

I may have some half-decent fictions, but most of them are one-shots (single chapter short stories) or are stories that wont be abundant with chapters as I intended to make them short and below 20 chapters. Example being Earth God's Lyre, Cries of Fluttershy, Iron Heart, and others.

Now, stories like Dawn of Darkness, Love of I, and Tale of Heroes, I want those to be around the 40+ mark. and completely enjoyable for both me and the readers.

So help me Din, I shall be satisfied!!!

PS: I'm so sorry guys, these last few journals were either me complaining or venting. (doesn't help my current situation with my right thumb having a cut on the side where the nail meets the skin. It's a very aggrivating cut that sends a massive wave of pain when I hit my thumb or use it while gripping something. It's not a big cut either, so ironic that such a small thing could cripple me in typing.)

Maybe I'm just too lazy? Or completely uninspired. I used to be highly motivated, nowadays, with all this stress, I barely get a few paragraphs out for whatever I'm writing on. And if I stop for a day, I never get back to finish it. I lose momentum that fast. Perhaps I'm just distracted?

Ugh...